Parenthood

Having children can make many things tricky. The simplest of tasks can seem unbelievably challenging when faced with working around or working with children. What I am finding though is that if I complete any task with one or both of my boys present, I feel an immense sense of satisfaction. I am trying to figure out if having a sense of pride over these things is valid or actually a bit pathetic.

Take yesterday for example… My parents are out visiting but were Dan in Kitwe for the better part of the day. Jacob is normally in nursery in the mornings however he is home this week as he may have a mild case of the chicken pox or some other random viral infection. So today in the midst of my two children I feel like I accomplished a few things, not like painting a room or anything, oh on, far more insignificant.

  1. I got out of my pajamas. Granted, it was into yesterday’s clothes that were lying on the floor, but I changed.
  2. I had a shower. Timed perfectly with Ben’s first nap and opening a couple of late birthday presents for Jacob, I had a lovely and even not too rushed shower.
  3. I put on makeup and did my hair. Impressive, I know.
  4. I made soup for supper. It was actually a multiple step process and it even tastes delicious.
  5. There wasn’t excessive crying on anyone’s behalf.
  6. I fed my children.
  7. I had a bit of lunch… kind of.
  8. I had a meaningful time of playing play dough with Jacob and took him to the nearby play park. He didn’t hurt himself as I let him play probably a bit too independently as I fed Ben.
  9. I had a nap, a glorious hour that recharged me for the rest of the day.
  10. I did a load of laundry and got it on the washing line

That’s it. Between the hours of 8:30 and 3:30 that is what I accomplished. On one hand, I feel amazing – I have supper made, my kids were relatively happy, I had a nap. And I should mention I did all of this and Jacob didn’t have a minute of TV time. Supermum? Oh yeah.

And then I stop and think about it and realize how basic these tasks are and I feel much less amazing and much more pathetic. How is that doing basic tasks with children is so difficult? Daily I feel a bit inept as I fail to do so many things that are so ‘easy’.

Also I failed to mention that Ben slept most of the day, Jacob had a three and a half hour nap, we have house help (so I didn’t even do all of the dishes for the soup I made). I hang my head in shame…

My Mum and Dad are here for this month and I am exceedingly grateful. However it begs the question of how on earth I am going to cope when they leave?!

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2 thoughts on “Parenthood

  1. Never underestimate how hard it is with little people around! Take the feeling of achievement and dump the negative feelings right back where they came from. You are doing brilliantly (you achieved more in a day than I did). And when all the help goes, HIs grace will be enough! Take a step back (often) and look at the bigger picture. Miss you guys. Love and hugs xxx

  2. I only just realised you guys have a blog when I logged into the PC and saw Jase had this page open (sorry guys!) I had a chuckle when I read this entry – not because I thought you were pathetic, but quite the opposite! I could sense the feeling of having successfully achieved several difficult goals – feeding baby, doing laundry, making a (delicious) home cooked meal and spending quality time with the older child! Not easy. In the early days when Isabella was under a year old it would actually feel like an achievement for me if I managed to do the school run with all the kids, and returned home with all 3 intact. On the way home I often felt as though I could conquer the world and would consider doing something random and spontaneous like going to the park instead of home. The operational word there is “consider”. I recall feeling such a sense of pride that I had “done it again” and usually somewhere during mid-elation would realise that I was actually celebrating the fact I had just done a school run. Plenty more where those came from. That said – well done Melissa, and hopefully you are settling into a new rhythm of life. Love, Amy

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